2013 Will Be My Year

Ok so I have to say I am actually really really looking forward to this year. If I look back at last year I started the year feeling really down I spent New Year on the couch with my parents while Biggy worked in a bar and I felt crap... I hated my job...I was really fat...Biggy was working nights...we lived in a caravan...my "friends" were letting me down all over the place and I really thought things couldn't really get alot worse.

 

They didn't get worse... I started the long journey of sorting out my life and had a great year...I got a new job... Biggy got a GREAT job which is 9-5...we moved into a lovely renovated place...I realised that my friends were bringing me down and left them...and I lost the most weight I have ever lost and kept it off....

 

2013 is going to be even better... I feel stronger than ever and only now believe that with age comes wisdom and confidence... I am becoming less afraid of what people think and not putting so much relevance onto others and more onto me and my life...I am really happy with our lifestyle and environment and now we have the big things sorted I can focus on me personally. So here are my aims for 2013.....drum roll please...

 

 

#1        I will reach 164lbs (11.9st) by the end of the year

This will mean that I am at my Weight Watchers goal....which will also be a grand total of 32lbs loss for the year...Now I figure I lost 26lbs since March 2012 which gives me 2 extra months to lose 6lbs... and with the extra knowledge I now have and no weddings to attend it should  will be achievable.

 

 

 

 

#2         I will be less dramatic

I blow up very quickly. I take alot of things to the extreme and it is just not needed. It makes your life alot more stressful and makes Biggy as mad as hell. I really want to work on it.

 

#3        I will communicate more

Half the reason I blow up is because I don't communicate very well. I will imagine/plan something in my head... i.e at 6.00 o'clock we will be sitting down and having a romantic glass of wine. But I then don't tell this to Biggy so at 6.10 he is still doing what ever he is doing and I am on the couch with a bottle of wine getting angrier and angrier with him then causing me to blow up it really isn't very fair as he has no idea that this was what my plan was. It is the same with feelings.. if i am hurt I just say I am fine or if I don't agree I just say whatever... I should calmly (without being dramatic) say what I think so we can compromise or together work out a better plan.

 

 

#4        I will not stress if things don't go to plan

I am the kind of person that plans ( if you couldn't tell) and I look at the time alot. I always want things done a certain way... which most of the time is good there is nothing wrong with you wanting things done a certain way or your way... BUT I stress if things don't go to plan...and I shouldn't. If normally I have lunch at 1 and people are coming over and don't arrive till 2 which then of course means we don't end up eating until 4 (which will then throw out the rest of the meals) it doesn't matter. If Biggy wants to do something else first which will effect the plan I have in my head (see above aim!) and unless it will really have a big impact then it doesn't matter. I need to be a bit more flexible and relax!

 

 

#5      I will make wise clothes choices

I buy clothes every month and yet I have nothing to wear... I spend around £100 a month at least on things I know deep down don't suit me or I am a bit unsure about. This is stupid and I shouldn't do it. It's a waste of money and not who I am. I want to really sort out my fashion. I know what I want to wear and the style I want to have.... now I just need to stick to it and work at it. I also need to realise that I might have to hold off buying new things while I get the figure I want, the reward of walking into a shop and buying the style I want and it really suiting me and FITTING me will really be worth all the clothes I buy that I don't really like. I can learn with the things I have and buy wise choices now that will stand the test of time. Clothes is one of the main reasons I wanted to lose weight..so embrace it.. I am not the person I once was and should/can/will dress to suit my lifestyle now and not think "I can't wear that I am not that person" because shock horror.. I am that person... and I deep down know it!

 

#6       I will value true friendship

The 2 years I have gained alot of friends and have lost alot of friends. Right now we don't have many friends...something Biggy and I are aware of but are not cut up about. The friends that we have left behind are people that weren't true friends, are not supportive and want a friendship that is one way. I don't want that. We don't want that. The friends we do have I value above all else as they are the people that have shown me and  offered me everything I want in a friend. I will make better choices in 2013 and only give my time to people who have the same understanding of friendship as I do.

 

 

 

 

 

 

By the end of the year I will have built the first blocks of a very solid me...I can not wait.