Today I had another awesome workout... I loved it... I ran for 30mins straight and was so close to giving up around the 20-25 minute mark...I was thinking I can't do another 10 minutes...I just can't... but then I said to myself...Katherine yes you can... commit to it... work for it... you are mentally giving up ...you can do this...just one more minute more and guess what... I did complete the 30 minutes...I was sweating so much and had it dripping down my front (Sexiest thing ever seeing the sweat run over my collarbones) and then afterwards completed 40 abb-crunches and 30 squats...so feeling pretty damn good about myself! Particularly pleased as yesterday I had a bit of shit workout as woke up with a headache that then progressed into a migraine...I still did my toning workout but was really hating it and I am sure didn't do it with as much gusto (great word) as I could have...at the moment my toning workout consists of a 10min Victoria Secret Workout (see video) and then an Abb Routine mixed in with crunches, planks and squats...
Yesterday I didn't come anywhere close to hitting my step goal and mile goal with my Fitbit but due to not feeling great I wasn't too concerned about it..I have done a tally of my cals consumed this week for my allowance as I have gone over twice but then also been under 3 times... I need to burn or be under by an extra 132 calories to get back to an average of -500cals a day...so will try and achieve this today as I have already burnt 1209cals and have an estimated burn rate of 2556 for today so my food allowance is 2057cals which is quite alot...Gosh...Don't I sound like I know what I am talking about....lol!
Feeling good at the moment which is fantastic as this time last week my bout of blues was just starting...going to continue to have a good weekend and see the scales drop for Monday - really want to see 186lbs..or less...as truly tired of seeing 187...enough is enough... so fat..be warned...my workouts are coming for you!!
Everybody needs inspiration and motivation to get to the gym in the mornings or to lose weight or resist that snack...after 2 and half weeks I am still struggling to open my eyes at 6.20am...but every day I do it...and every day I go to the gym... this is what I think of when I am lying in my warm bed, next to Biggy, still tired and considering staying in bed....this is what makes me get up and go do my workout...
It's so funny... I struggle so much with my weight... and since coming back from Holiday after losing a whopping 7lbs in 2 weeks I have struggled to move closer to my goal of 13stone...It makes me think...what am I doing wrong..? Is it so hard to lose weight... ? The answer should be NO!
Every day I look back at my food diary and think "Well I could have done without that and I could have not indulged in that" and it is that simple. If I didn't give into my cravings and I hit my daily targets with my Fitbit I would lose 1lbs a week and within the 4 weeks I have been back be 1lbs away from hitting target! I know that this is much easier said than done but why can't I get it in my head that if I just stuck to what everything is telling me then I would be successful.
I am now in a good routine of going to the gym and the last 2 weeks have gone to the gym every time I have supposed to and have been doing the workouts I wanted to achieve... but there is little point in doing all of this and literally sweating my arse off if I am going to ruin it by my eating habits. Every time I go over my calorie limit it is due to food that I don't need like chocolate, crisps, wine etc... and every time I regret it the next day... those craving are purely emotional eating and I give in to them every time. It's stupid... Do you know what Biggy said to me the other day "Just think..if you could control your eating habits think how much slimmer you would be"...he didn't mean it the way it came out..he was saying how I have come so far and still have bad habits .... I had just had to pour a glass of water over the left over home-made sweet and sour chicken as I was secretly eating it in the kitchen while Biggy was in the sitting room...
I know what I want to achieve, I know how to achieve it so why do I still take solace in food...? Don't get me wrong I am getting alot better... I no longer snack in between meals at work...If I catch myself doing something I shouldn't, like the sweet and sour, I do deal with it then and there by either spitting it out, throwing whatever it is in the bin or telling Biggy what is going through my head and so not then being able to do it secretly. I even count EVERYTHING I eat be it good or bad..and I really do mean everything If ti has passed my lips I write it down and that's why how I know I make such stupid mistakes...because sometimes I still fail and do eat secretly and do have the food that I know I shouldn't have...
I really really want to sort this out... I am really impressed with myself with the gym and if I can succeed in that I can and I will succeed in regards to food...bad food makes me depressed and does nothing for me..so realise that and stop eating it.
I have to say after my post of being totally in the zone last week I fell off the wagon over the weekend and only had myself to blame. It started with me just being really tired on Friday which then resulted in me having comfort food in the day (Biscuits) and then in the evening I cooked a (very yummy) Skinny Sweet and Sour Chicken from SkinnyMom which is fine apart from the fact we also had some spring rolls as starters and I had 2 of those and about 2 large glasses of wine. Then on Saturday I baked a cake, I only baked it because again I was feeling down and I wanted to eat some raw cake mixture (don't even ask) even while I was eating it I knew I was going to regret it as a) it's so so not good for you and b) I feel really bloated afterwards as I am pretty sure it expands in my stomach! Then in the evening we went out for dinner where I ate a Skinny Pizza (low cal) at Zizi's but bumped it up with 2 large glasses of white wine...then on Sunday although I ate better still felt really down in the dumps.
I weighed myself on Monday and saw no change so still at 187lbs which I am not happy about as it means in 4 weeks I have lost 2lbs and during the week this week I was doing really well and was seeing 186 on the scales so could have lost 2lbs this week if I had stayed focused.
I need to look at the trigger for my "blues" as they have lasted a couple of days and have really got me down and made me do stupid things like overeat and drink wine! I think it really started when I tried on the beige trousers and looked at the behind view of me, what I saw I just hated and although I know that the view I had was mainly due to my mirror being one of those cheap ones and so giving the image of circus mirror it was still not a great image to see. It's amazing how much it affected me as I went from feeling really in control and good to right down in the dumps and saying so many negative things in my head. All the negativity increased when I ate bad food and drank wine.. wine especially makes me hate myself as it just brings out the "Demoralizing Me" and the things I say to myself are shocking... its really not good especially when your BF is all over you, loving you, appreciating you and all you can do is tell yourself how ugly and fat and disgusting you are... it's hard to be in the mood when you have that running through your head all the time...and so unfair on the other person as they think it's them...
On Monday I went to the gym and actually had a really good session. This week I am tasking myself with running for straight 30 minutes as last week I was running for a straight 25 minutes. After this week I will be looking at increasing my speed as I only have time for 30 minute run in the mornings before going to work. I managed to do the 30 minute run no problems...was feeling it towards the end but kept on going and for that I am really pleased!
I was still a bit down yesterday and today I am ok, not great but not bad. I don't know what gets into me... something will trigger a bout of sadness that will last a day or two and it is always related to my weight, body image and size...and although I know I am so much better than I used to be and so much further along the right path there is nothing I can say to myself to get me out of the bout... I just need to wait for it to pass....
This week I am focusing on healthy eating, gym and losing 1lbs... that is my goal... I only have 5lbs to go until I hit 13 stone and I don't want that taking months and months... I would love to lose them by the 14th of June... but we will see....
Oh my goodness......I am KNACKERED. Really need to have a rest day and luckily it is Saturday tomorrow! Got up this morning and went to the gym, almost didn't go (as normal) as was just feeling so tired but just did the usual thing and got up and got going... Arrived at the gym a little later than normal but still managed in a 30 minute run... The first 5 minutes I always spend walking at a quick pace to warm up so ran straight for 25 minutes but was running at a 4.3mph pace and so covered just over 2 miles. This morning I enjoyed the run but did struggle towards the end, my mind kept on saying just turn the speed down a bit but I didn't slow down and kept on telling myself that is was my mind that was giving in not my body and that I could complete it...and low and behold I did complete it with no regrets. Because I started slightly later this morning I didn't have time to do any crunches or squats but I am not beating myself up about it as to be honest my body is aching... 6 days in the gym on the trot....whoop whoop!
I have noticed today however that because I am tired I am wanting to eat "Comfort Food" and I will totally admit that I have had a couple of biscuits today but I have calculated them into MFP and am sticking to my limit no problems. It's so annoying because of those biscuits weren't in the office I wouldn't have had them... but because they are there and I am tired my willpower is pretty much Zero!
Yesterday I bought some really nice Beige colour Skinny Jeans from M&S (£22.50) and was very happy to report I just slipped on a size 16 (Have been size 20/22)... I did try the size 14 but am not quite there yet... I really like them as they will go with quite a few of my tops and can be either dressed up or down. They looked perfect from the front and I did look at the back quickly and all looked good... I tried them on again at home just to be sure and then had a proper look at the back... and OMG... I am really not sure about it....I don't think they are doing alot of favours to my backside but also not sure if it's my warped vision of myself or the mirror.....Basically I realised how chunky my thighs are which is funny as I had been thinking my thighs and hips have been looking alot better recently.... I am going to show you what I mean with a very basic drawing...
Do you see what I mean...? So when wearing light coloured jeans I just thought it really accentuated how my hips are alot wider than my arse... and I think your arse should finish or align with your hips... not like above! The extra "Hip" after my waist is going down and is considerably better than it used to be... but still not totally smooth and that is what I am really aiming for... to have that clean smooth line on the hips... I am going to wear the jeans tonight at home and see what Biggy says... I also know that the squats will help as since losing weight my arse has got flatter...still wide but now just flat...
Well I have to say I am feeling just so in the Zone at the moment and am totally loving it. I have been going to the gym when I am supposed to and have fought off the demon that says "Oh just stay in bed" every morning...it does make me laugh that I have the same debate with myself EVERY morning and every morning it wins for about 30 seconds and I lie back down but then I think "If I don't go to the gym I am not going to get the body I want" and that's it... I'm up and out of the bed and in the gym by 6.30am! Also what is great is that I am actually enjoying the gym, the other day while running I actually was enjoying it... it was a very weird moment for me!
I am also doing really well with my Fitbit and hitting my targets every day. They are harder to hit on Tuesday's and Thursday's as they are my toning days at the gym so don't take so many steps in the morning to set me up for the day but then last Tuesday I got home and had myself a dance party around the house to make sure I hit the 10k step mark! Calorie wise I have been doing well and keeping in my limit, even when I have a small blip ( someone opened a biscuit tin yesterday) I make sure I counteract it by adjusting my dinner to still keep in target.
Then today I am having just such a good self-image day. I have caught my reflection in the mirror and thought...gosh.. is that me... I look quite good... I don't look fat anymore...my hips are looking alot smaller and my waist is looking trimmer... I think alot of this is coming from the knowledge that I have gone to the gym and am actually being active, it makes me notice my body as it's sore and tired and being used and toned up and it does make me feel really good to have that knowledge..
I really feel that I have hit a path in my life where this is going to stick, I am enjoying the gym in the morning, I am actually knowing how many calories I am burning during the day and so can stick to my limit with a much stronger knowledge that I really am below my limit and where and when I need to I can just so easly adjust it. Going to the gym has resulted in good moods which has then resulted in me eating better as I don't want to ruin the hard work I have done... So yes...all in all... I am feeling pretty damn good.... long may it last!
I don't know if anyone else has noticed this but recently there seems to be a big focus on squats...Where the hell has this come from? I'm not saying it's a bad thing AT ALL...but funny how all of a sudden squats are everywhere.... but also I guess it shows how my life has changed that I now notice squats being in the media!!!
Anyway, yesterday was my toning day at the gym so no running or cross trainer just good old weights and toning exercises... I decided to throw in some squats and see what all the fuss is about... but I have to say...I struggled ... nobody has ever really shown me how to do a squat and I think it's one of those things where you can very easily do it wrong and so not get the benefits from it... So here I am to the rescue!! Find below a video on how to do the perfect squat thanks to YouTube....seriously what would we do without it!
My inner thighs were sore this morning which I didn't realise was from the squats yesterday until I went to do more squats this morning and felt the pain... so that's a good sign I guess! As long as I can perfect them I am defo going to incorporate them into my every day workout... at the moment I Run on a Monday, Toning on a Tuesday, Cross Trainer on a Wednesday, Toning on a Thursday, Running on Friday and what I want on a Sunday (a more gentle workout) but every day regardless of what workout I am doing I always do crunches so will now also bring in squats...
Please note this is not a paid review...all thoughts are my own and all images taken from Google.
So if anybody else is on MyFitnessPal you will see that there are a number of different apps that you can buy that sync with MFP. I have been looking at the Fitbit for quite awhile (I did ask for it for Christmas but unfortunately I didn't get it) This is how it's described on the MFP website:
Fitbit Trackers monitor your steps, distance, calories burned and more. Automatically sync the data to your Fitbit account via your computer and select smartphones. Set goals and stay motivated to keep on your path to fitness with graphs, badges, and friendly competitions.
One of the reasons why I wanted to get something that would help monitor my activity level is although I go to the gym and the machines tell me how many calories I am doing and how far I am going I don't think that they are actually that accurate I also love me some health or diet related gizmos so of course was attracted to it! The Fitbit Zip costs around £50 in the UK and can be bought from most major tech or health retail stores...I bought mine online from Amazon.
Now I will be totally honest when I first got it I just thought it was a fancy pedometer with some extra things thrown in and was going to use it so I knew really how far I traveled each day... it is SO much more than that. Firstly let me tell you about the features:
Positioning: The Fitbit is really small and comes with a little holder which has a incredibly sturdy clip with it. It is designed for you to be able to clip it on pretty much wherever you want..the best places will either be on your trousers, a pocket or where I clip mine... the center bit of my bra. The reason why I clip mine there is that nobody can see it and yet it is still easily accessible for you to check on throughout the day if you want to.
To change the display all you have to do is give your Fitbit a firm tap with the finger and it will tell you a number of different things:
Steps:You are given a target of 10,000 steps a day to achieve and you can clearly see how many steps you have done at any point throughout the day by giving the Fitbit a quick tap.
Calories: Your calorie target will depend on how you set up your Fitbit profile (More on that later) but the Fitbit will show you how many calories you have used throughout the day, this will include any exercise you have done and general calories used from just living.
Distance:You are given a target of covering 5 miles a day in distance and again this will tell you how far you have gone and again includes distance traveled when doing any exercise and walking around the office or to the car etc..
Time: You have a clock on it
Emotions: You have a little smiley face that will change depending on how you are doing throughout the day.
Now this alone is all good, but when you then bring together the phone app and/or the website the Fitbit really comes in to it's own. So firstly you need to set up your profile, you say what your current weight is and what you want to lose and then at what speed. It works on a calorie deficit a day and you can set for -250cals a day, -500, -750 and -1000. I have mine set for -500 a day which will equal out to 1lbs loss a week.
Now this is the magical part that took me a while to work out: Your daily calorie allowance to include the -500cals will be worked out on your activity for the day. So each day you will have a different calorie allowance depending on how active you have been. So if one day you don't do anything but sit on the couch all day your calorie allowance will be really low for that day but if the next day you go to the gym, walk around town and then do the housework your calorie allowance will be higher. The allowance will change throughout the day to reflect your activity levels.
The Fitbit syncs with your phone and computer through Bluetooth and the Fitbit comes with a Bluetooth USB to plug into your computer in case you don't have Bluetooth. This means all your information is synced to your profile throughout the day. You could just sync it at the end of the day but I don't think you will get the best results in regards to food allowance so I sync mine through my phone app throughout the day.
What does this mean: Previously I had just said to myself ok I will have an allowance of 1500cals a day (-500cals from recommended 2000cals a day for women). This is all very well and good but what happens if one day I don't do anything and the deficit is actually only 200cals from cals USED or another I do loads and I have a deficit of 900cals from cals USED. It is not a realistic plan just to say how many cals you can eat without knowing how many cals you are using through the day. By using the Fitbit you can get accurate info on how much you should be eating all the time. The calories IN (food) should be 500 cals less than calories OUT (exercise)
Here is a photo of the computer dashboard:
This is my profile this morning, as you can see it has all the things previously mentioned as well as weight goal, very active minutes, food plan and Calories In vs Out. The dashboard will give you more detail on all the aspects so you can look at weekly stats etc.... The main thing for me is that if you you are reflecting a higher cals IN to your cals OUT you will get a warning and info on how many cals you need to burn to bring you back in to the goal zone. Your food intake syncs with your MFP account (you can also use the Fitbit calorie counter if you wanted to) and in turn the amended Calorie allowance from the Fitbit syncs with your MFP account.
I have been using the Fitbit for a week so far and last week I lost 2lbs which I am really pleased with as I did have one day of heavy heavy eating and hardly any movement. I have found that since using it I have been alot more active as I want to hit all the goals each day, I am checking my Fitbit all the time to see how many cals I have used and how many steps I have done. Yesterday I wanted to go and get an IcedTea and there were 2 shops I could have gone to, I went to the furthest as I wanted to rack up the steps. I think of ways that I can make sure I hit my goal, for instance today I went to the gym but only did weight training so didn't take any steps, so at Lunch I went for a walk instead of sitting at my desk eating my lunch to make sure I got to the 5 mile mark.
What it also means is that if you have a blow out and eat more than you wanted to you can still make sure you have a 500 cal deficit by ensuring you still burn more cals than you take IN. All you have to do is look on your app or your computer and it will tell you what you have to do to make sure you hit your goal.
There are so many things that I have missed out in regards to the dashboard and what else it can do, but needless to say my Fitbit is now kept by my bed at night so I can put it on asap in the morning and it is one of the last things I take off at night. Making sure I accurately count my cal intake with MFP and making sure I accurately keep track of my activity levels will enable me to have control over my weight loss and hopefully make sure I understand how I can make sure the weight keeps on going down.
Whoop Whoop! Got on the scales this morning and saw a very nice 13.5lbs (187lbs) ...I am really really pleased about this as on Monday and Tuesday I ate really badly! I have been going to the gym and doing good workouts and after Tuesday I have been really thinking about my food intake. I have been using my Fitbit this week and I defo think that it has had a positive effect on my activity levels and food intake... I am loving it so much.. I will do a review of it tomorrow so defo check in tomorrow to have a read. If I had millions I would buy you all one!!
This week I want to make sure I continue going to the gym and also I really want to cut down on wine as usual...I have been ok this week but not great...
I went to the gym this morning and ran 30 minutes and covered just under 3 miles which I am very pleased about, I also went to the gym on Sunday, Friday and Thursday so burning lots of calories...
Oh my goodness....it's been a whole week since I last posted which is so bad and not my intentions at all...for the 1st time in long time my life got in the way...
The biggest thing from the last 7 days is that I completed the Walk the Walk which is a 13.8 mile walk through London at night in the aid of Breast Cancer.(Donate Here) We did it on Saturday night/Sunday morning and didn't start walking until 11.45pm! We finished at 4.30ish and it was the longest 13 miles of my life! My legs were aching so so much..partly due to the fact that I didn't do any training...but also due to the fact that we were going at quite a quick steady pace. On Sunday I felt like an 80 year old and couldn't stand up straight... I took lots of long hot baths and by Tuesday I was back to normal!
Work has also been quite turbulent the last week and I have really not been enjoying it which has then also lead to quite alot of emotional eating...everything has settled back down now and there are potentially new horizons coming up but not sure yet..
In regards to eating like I said it hasn't been great the last few days but I am back on track now. One thing that did amaze me was that on Thursday and Friday I ate bread and cake....then I got on the scales on Saturday morning and the scales reflected a 5lbs gain... I was like what the hell...that scale is going in totally the wrong direction! I do find it interesting as the week before last I didn't eat bread, pasta, rice or potatoes once and had a visible loss and then last week I did eat those things and I had a significant gain... the good thing is that due to walking 13 miles and then being too sore to get into the kitchen on Sunday I weighed in on Monday at 189lbs (13.7st)
I returned to the gym this morning for the 1st time since last Friday and ran 25 minutes straight with a 5 minute brisk walk warm up and covered 2.2miles which I am very pleased about. I hope to see a loss this week and am seriously back on the bandwagon and feeling great for it...
In regards to future I would love to see myself at bang on 182lbs by the 15th of June which is when I am running 5k with Zest Challenge... so it's just over 4 weeks away and as long as I stay on the straight and narrow...eat well and go to the gym I am pretty sure I can achieve it...
I am so very proud to say... I did it! I went to the gym this morning. I am extra proud as I was so very close to not going...
My Alarm went off at 6.00am... no problems as I doze when the 1st alarm goes off... then the alarm goes off at 6.10am.. that's when I started thinking...agh do I really want to go..why don't I just go on my way home this evening... yes that's what I will do... (knowing deep down that another excuse would come up this evening) so I reset my alarm for 6.45am... but then I lay there thinking.. If I don't go I won't get the body I want.. If I don't go I will never go.. If I don't go now then I will still have to face that whole "1st time back" workout which is always the hardest.... SO I threw off the covers and was halfway out of bed when Biggy pulled me back in for a cuddle...I did mumble "no I have to go to the gym" but in my head was going "fine i'll go tomorrow"...literally I was in his arms for 2 minutes before I started being pushed out of the bed again and was being told "off you go to the gym"... a few minutes later I was quite literally marching out of the door. Got to the gym for 6.35 and was on the treadmill for 6.40am!
I did 25 minutes and covered just under 3k... the first 5 minutes of the 25 minutes was spent walking which means that I ran for 20 minutes straight... now some of you may be thinking ... 20 minutes flat I do that in my sleep... But I haven't been for to the gym in 6/7 weeks and I have never been much of a runner so to go straight in and do 20 minutes flat made me pretty damn proud... I finished with a couple of sets of abb crunches and then went for my shower at 7.10am.. so that's a good 30 minute workout...
Killers But Can Really Feel It
I do plan on going again tomorrow morning but would like to be at the gym for 6.30 (when it opens) so I can be running for 6.35. I need to have completed my workout by 7.10/7.15 so I can get to work on time so I can realistically get a 40 minute work out in. My plan is to go every day during the week.. I know that's alot and a bit Zero to Hero... but I have come to realise that with me it seems to be all or nothing... I can't just have one and I can't go every other day as otherwise the days inbetween just start to stretch out..that's how a one day break turned into a 6 week break...I won't necessarily run every day but will mix it up with toning workouts as well...
I would really like to try and do 5k within 30 minutes... so that will be my mini aim...when I last did 5k which was back in August I did it in 45 minutes.. so to do it in under 30 minutes would be amazing!
Ok... will totally admit that today has been a bad day and it totally due to the fact that it has been a stressful day and I turned to food to cheer me up - I knew I was doing it and I didn't stop - NOT GOOD.
At work we have two offices but last night there was a fire near our other office and the whole street has been closed off - it means we have two offices of people in one office... the phrase... "To many Chiefs and not enough Indians" ... came to mind straight away. I was doing fine until lunch, I had to get out of the office for 30 mins so went to a cafe and ordered a milkshake...1st mistake... I then had my lunch which was soup. I wasn't really digging the soup and ended up having some raisin lady fingers that had been brought into the office ... I ate 6 of them at 52 cals a pop...so that's 312 wasted calories... I then had a mars bar and a slice of chocolate cake. I am so annoyed with myself as all of those calories are wasted and I don't even feel better for eating any of that food.. it didn't solve the problems and hasn't magically made the day go faster... so really it was a stupid thing to do especially due to the fact that I knew I was eating from stress and not hunger or need.
Also I have something else to admit... I haven't been to the gym since coming back from holiday. I don't know what's wrong with me... I think it's the 1st time dread of going back... you think it's going to be so much worse than it is and you forget about all the positive aspects of the gym.. I think it's also because I have lost weight without going to the gym... and lets face it... if you know you can lose the weight you want without having to go the gym wouldn't you not go... but I also know how ever much weight I lose I am not going to tone up without going to the gym... so tomorrow morning at 6.15.. I am rolling out of bed and into my gym stuff to start my good habits. I am also drawing a line under today (as in now) and starting again. I was doing really well and today has been a blip... I know that... I also know I am going to be paying for the cakes and chocolate..
So how was everybody's Bank Holiday? Mine was good... hot and good. Saturday I went down to see my brother and family as it was my nieces Birthday - I have to say I was really proud of myself as I was at a three year old's birthday party and there were so many sweet treats and things and I did not have one! Then for lunch my brother offered Pizza and I had two small slices and then filled up on Salad! On Sunday morning I did have a sneak peak on the scales and was really thrilled to see 187lbs...so happy. On Sunday I spent the day tidying and going food shopping as Biggy was coming home in the evening.... and I prepared a really yummy dinner of lamb escalopes with a rosemary, red wine and mushroom sauce served with white rice all washed down with some yummy cava. It was so good to have Biggy back and was so nice just to catch up with him and hear about his trip... due to Sunday night's dinner when I did the weigh in on Monday I did see 188lbs and although I was so tempted to record 187lbs I knew it wouldn't really be right... so I didn't.
Monday is my cheat day and I had planned to take Biggy out for lunch to a really posh pub by the river, it was all going well until we had to wait 1hour for our starters and then a further 1.5 hours for our mains so in total we were there for 2.5 hours....and we actually left before our mains came out. I was gutted and happy at the same time (mainly due to saving my bank balance a whack). Our starters were really nice as we had a sharing meze platter to not too unhealthy but my main was a homemade Cheeseburger ....I was so looking forward to it but at the same time god knows how many calories would have been in it! It was such a shame that our meal went wrong as really wanted to treat Biggy, the restaurant comp'd our starter but to be honest I wasn't very impressed. That's the trouble of having worked in hospitality for so long you know exactly what's wrong in certain situations. It was purely a lack of forecasting and not enough staff...rocky mistake to make my friend ..rocky mistake to make!
Instead we managed to get to a Supermarket before 4 and I bought a Pizza Express Pizza - it was about 700 cals for the whole thing and although I was going to have one of their 500 cals ones I did have a moment of "F It" and then we also bought some ice cream to have as well .. a certain brand of cookie dough ice cream! I felt like I was about to pop after but it was funny as all I had for breakfast was melon and a few months ago to polish of a whole pizza and some ice cream would have been totally normal. Yay me!
The not snacking in between meals is really working out for me at the moment as well which I am really pleased about and I am also learning to ride-out hunger pangs. Today I have really cut down on the calories mainly due to the amount I ate yesterday, I know I don't need more food as I still haven't used the food I consumed yesterday so I can equal out the calories consumed.
Hopefully all of this will have a positive effect on the scales for next week as I am literally inching closer to that big 13 stone mark (182lbs)
I am still here, since returning from holiday I haven't really been feeling it... I guess it's a case of post holiday blues...but really it isn't as our holiday wasn't really a holiday holiday....I am just feeling a bit "blah" with my life...Some of it is due to the fact that Biggy is away and I am finding it hard...it's funny I am not missing him hugely as I talk to him every day but I am missing having him around and missing just cuddling up to him in the evenings and missing being able to just chat to him if I want to...
Then work is really stressing me out at the moment. I am just so not motivated or driven by it at the moment. I am in a ridiculous situation that I want to have a nice life, nice things, nice cars, a nice house etc but am not career driven. The two don't go together...I know that until I have children I have to work and I have to earn as much money as possible to be able to get that lifestyle...I know Biggy will do well and although I feel strangely confident that we will have everything we want... I am tired of not doing what I really want to do at the moment and instead, have the need to earn the money dominate things. Since coming back from Cameroon both Biggy and I have said that we will invest in the country and I know that eventually that is how we will earn our money through private investments and having our own business... I just want it now...why do we have to wait... sigh....
Food wise this week so far has gone really well - I am sticking to my 1500 limit and have actually come in under it a few times.. I have kept a sneaky eye on the scales and am still at 189lbs...which to be honest I am really really happy about as was totally expecting to have a gain due to being back from Holiday. I have read a few things about the 5:2 plan and am thinking of trying it out but not sure...I did do it on Tuesday as Biggy and I had a leaving dinner on Monday and I ate more than I wanted to. I found it easy on Tuesday but then I did also try doing it on Thursday and actually had to have some dinner...I think this is mainly due to the fact that I had a really small dinner on Wednesday. I am really pleased to report also that I have not snacked in between meals so far this week, I am really pleased about this and it is defo a habit that I am wanting to get into and keep...it's surprisingly hard to not snack and has made me realise that snacking was a big part of my day..even if it healthy...!
